The Grass is Dead on This Side
by Hitam
Summary: First person drabbles. Axel on Roxas, Demyx on Zexion, Saix on Xemnas, and now Zexion on Demyx. All types of pairings will be added, and I do accept & want requests.
1. Perfect

_**The Grass is Dead on This Side**_

**Disclaimer: All I own is my soul, and even that it's up for rent.**

**Notes: Mostly these are drabbles in first person. None of the chapters will relate, unless said otherwise. (A few will be follow ups.) Review, be nice! ;x

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_Perfect_**

_**Axel on Roxas**_

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Roxas was cold and distant; he was the text book definition of a nobody.

That guy couldn't feel, and he couldn't even recall how it was to feel. It's no surprise he was oblivious to my advances, not because he's stupid; Roxas was extremely intelligent. He just couldn't understand the concept of friendship or even socializing in general. Roxas wasn't like most nobodies in the organization; he never remembered how it was to have a heart. You can't miss what you never had, you know what I mean?

I thought that for awhile, but then I thought about it. Did I ever truly have Roxas? I don't think I did, but I miss him.

I needed Roxas, I still need Roxas what am I talking about? Roxas reminded me that I could have been less fortunate. I still remember how it is to have a heart, and part of me wanted me to share that with Roxas. If he had memories of his other, maybe he wouldn't have been manipulated like he was. Roxas is one of the biggest paradoxes I've ever encountered. That boy couldn't feel, but he made me constantly recall emotions and feelings I once felt. He was logical, tactical, a lone wolf, the perfect fighter. Yet he was oblivious, gullible, confused, and brash when it came to himself.

Roxas couldn't ever care about anyone, even if he tried with all his might. It's not his fault though; he was just too damn perfect.

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**Fin**


	2. Trump Card

_**The Grass is Dead on This Side**_

_**Disclaimer: All I own is my soul, and even that it's up for rent.**_

_**Notes: Mostly these are drabbles in first person. None of the chapters will relate, unless said otherwise. (A few will be follow ups.) Review, be nice! ;x

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_**Trump Card**_

_Demyx on Zexion_

Sometimes I forget why I joined the organization in first place. If you get past the facts of Xemnas' coercive speech, the promise of getting a heart, and number six. Number six is a tricky one. Not only is he smart, he can make a little kid kill their parents. If you didn't get that, that means he is manipulative as hell. He tricked me of course, and don't you dare call me stupid.

He's damn good at what he does; he has the art of persuasion and manipulation down. His voice, his movements, his posture, his everything is calculated so perfectly. It's almost like he gets into your brain, finds a weakness, and exploits it as much as he can. Number six did this to all the organization members after him, it's almost like a screening process. Xemnas knows nobodies aren't as loyal as humans, so he has to have a trump card. That of course is Zexion, the ultimate secret weapon. No one exactly knows the extent of his powers, since no one is dumb enough to test it.

I remember the first time I talked to Zexion. The entire conversation was awkward, maybe because I knew I wasn't like the other organization members. I don't remember exactly how long ago it was, but the memory feels perfectly intact.

"What is your name, number nine?" His voice was anything but comforting. It was cold and distant, like he wanted nothing to do with me.

"It's umm…Dem-Demyx. Why?" I said trying to recall the name Xemnas had assigned me.

"It's none of your concern number nine." His voice now had a hint of annoyance by this time.

"You can call me Demyx you know-"

"Is that a request?" He was teasing me by this point in time. His body moved in such away that my eyes slowly followed his ever small gesture. The flick of his hair, a small blink, even the slight movement of his wrist. Ever so often his eyes would meet at mine, and he knew it made me uncomfortable.

"No, it's just-"

"Then I will call you number nine."

"Zexion?" His head shifted and he looked directly at me.

"So you learned my name, eh?"

"I just heard that big guy call you that. I assume it is your name."

"Don't call me Zexion ever again, nine."

"Why not? It's your name."

"Nine, learn some things about me quickly or you'll end up as a dusk. Don't call me by my name, don't bug me, don't disrespect me, and if you must speak to me, it should be on the topic of the organization only. If I want to see you, I will come to you. Don't make me enforce my demands with force. I hate using physical force to obtain my goals, this makes me annoyed. You don't want me annoyed, I guarantee you this." His voice had a stinging sensation making ever word after it even colder and more malicious.

"If you say so." My self esteem probably would have plummeted here by now if I had a heart.

"It's sort of ironic how you are nine, and I am six. When you flip six, you get a nine. We are pretty much total opposites, yet I don't mind that. I've analyzed your behavior and contrasted it to mine. It seems everything you do; I would do the opposite of. I think it's almost complementing, don't you?" I blinked a few times trying to understand the sudden change of tone.

"Does that mean you want to be friends?"

"Nine, if I wanted to be friends with you, I would have never asked to speak to you personally like this, all alone with just the two of us in a room." He paused for a second and made sure he had my attention.

"I'll be in my room nine; you must walk past mine to get to yours."

I nodded my head and he swayed his hand, which I interpreted as a 'you can leave'.

"I arranged for a break for the both of us, so no one will question why we are both gone." By the time I turned around he had finished his sentence, he was out of my sight.

I shook my head out of confusion, he better not be this complicated in bed.

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**Fin**


	3. Machiavelli

_**The Grass is Dead on This Side**_

**Disclaimer: All I own is my soul, and even that it's up for rent.**

**Notes: Mostly these are drabbles in first person. None of the chapters will relate, unless said otherwise. (A few will be follow ups.) Review, be nice! ;x**

_I was asked to do this, and I've never written a Xemaix before.

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**Machiavelli**

_Saix on Xemnas_

"How much are you willing to do?" My eyes shot towards him as he spoke.

"What do you mean by that, Xemnas?" As I responded his lips formed a smirk and he let out a single laugh.

"What do you interpret it as, Saix?" His eyes were fixed on me, waiting for my response.

I'm loyal to him, so I'm not paranoid about his questioning. It seems over half the organization has turned on him. Yet sometimes it angers me; I warned him about the others, especially Axel and Roxas. He never listened to me; he just brushed it off like a greeting from a stranger. I put all my efforts and desires into the organization, sometimes I forgot if it was for him or for the organization.

It seems like the organization's goal has shifted from getting hearts, to appeasing Xemnas' desire of his Kingdom Hearts. He reassures us that when his kingdom is complete, we will get our hearts.

What is his true goal? Will I continue to stand beside him without protest? Does he really want hearts for all of us? Is he just using us to get what he wants, and paying us off like meager mercenaries? In the end, does it matter? No.

The reason I do this, the reason I keep on doing this isn't as complicated as I once thought before. Without this drive, this goal, my shell of an existence would have no point.

"Whatever you want to interpret it as, Xemnas." I said now giving him a smirk.

He walked over to me, placed his right hand on my shoulder, and nodded.

"That's a good answer. Now about Sora-"

"I'll take care of it."

"Good, good. Then report back to me, you and I will be the first to get our hearts."

"I'm pleased you have enough confidence in me to destroy Sora and his friends."

"I always did, Saix. I never assign anyone a mission I don't believe they will succeed in."

"True."

I turned around walking towards the rooftop exit. I gave him one last look, and frowned.

Maybe one day when he gets his heart, he'll think back to this. Maybe, just maybe he'll think about what could have happened. It didn't need to be like this.

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**Fin**


	4. Antithesis

_**The Grass is Dead on This Side**_

**Disclaimer: All I own is my soul, and even that it's up for rent.**

**Notes: Mostly these are drabbles in first person. None of the chapters will relate, unless said otherwise. (A few will be follow ups.) Review, be nice! ;x**

Since everyone loved the Zexion one so much, here is a follow up (kind of?) of the Demyx on Zexion. I hope it is as good as the first one. If I wrote Demyx, just pretend it was Nine. xD

My brain is a bit off today...like it isn't normally? Also spacing is driving me mad. Agh.

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_Zexion on Demyx_

**_Antithesis_**

Even before I was a nobody, my desire to be social was little to none. Some took it as arrogance; some took it as apathy. I talked a lot, I still do, but the conversations I've always had were methods of collecting data. This still applies to date, but has become more acceptable since I am a nobody now. I still have retained my suave conversational skills, which have matured and have gotten better over the years. On the other hand, Nine is the polar opposite with his constant awkward moments dealing with silence and random outburst. Till this day understanding him almost seems impossible and not worth the effort.

Sometimes I want to be left alone, to let my own mind wonder off while I enjoy a mind twister or a riddle. Nine has learned the hard way about my behavior, maybe I should have given him a warning. Yet at the time I found nothing wrong with it, Lexaeus never said much about it. Nine was the one told me that this behavior is 'weird' and not 'normal'. He has learned now, which is most likely the reason he puts up with me still.

He won't be offended when I don't publicly congratulate him on a successful mission, not laugh at one of his jokes, or I won't see him in weeks and not say I missed him. Nine is almost naïve about the fact he lacks a heart, so sometimes he expects me to act like I have one. He doesn't want to let go of it, maybe in a few years he'll grow out of it and be jaded by this fact. This weakness intrigues me; it makes him ever changing and non-consistent. I've always worked with science which is built on logic, numbers, and cycles, Nine lacks these. It was awkward at first, but overtime I came to embrace these qualities of Nine which made him different from the other organization members.

Nine does not understand the organization as well as I do, but it's not his fault. He doesn't understand the reason why I have to lie, and say we are on missions together so we can spend time alone. Overtime he came to accept it, and overtime I began to grow fonder of spending time with him. I wouldn't be surprised if the superior started noticing how we seem to be missing every other meeting due to 'personal' excuses.

The usual method of getting alone time with Nine is pretty simple now. (I've taught him some of my methods of persuasion .) He says I'm a bad influence on him, but he likes it. Basically for meetings we say we have personal work to do, or we need to finish something up. We make sure not to give too many details, and we always make sure our plans correlate a bit, but not too much. (Just in case someone catches us, luckily that has yet to happen.) On our alone time we mostly just sit next to each other quietly. Sometimes we talk, but all I can talk about is work or science, which Nine hates greatly. So he's the one mostly talking, if we are talking.

It's sort of funny how I can pull of talking to a little kid about quantum physics, while they listen eagerly, yet when it comes to Nine I seem to lose some of that ability. I guess he has developed a resistance towards this, and he treats me like I am a 'normal' human. Not a normal nobody, but a human. Even when I was a human I was never treated normally due to my intelligence. It is very ironic now that I am a nobody, I am finally treated like a normal person by a nobody.

Once in a full moon I can invite Nine into my quarters. Lexaeus has helped me pull these off greatly. (Mostly by alibis and distracting other organization members.) The first time I fornicated with Nine was the first time I realized people aren't just things to study or collect date from. He hates when I say fornicate, he rather me say 'making love'. I told him there is no love between us, since we have no hearts, thus no love to be made. I remember the way he responded to that, he just said 'it's an expression, don't think too much of it!'. So now I say sex, which Nine says will do.

Sex with Nine is not as hollow as what I thought it would be. One of the hypotheses I have made to explain this, is the fact sex between two humans is an extremely emotional thing. So as nobodies, as shells, our bodies ripple off 'fossilized' feelings to compensate. This came to me after Nine told me he felt human again, just for a brief few seconds, after we had sex. I wrote it off at first as his brain's fatigue due to the sex. I'm rambling again, aren't I? Nine says I ramble too much sometimes.

Sometimes I wonder what if we met each other as humans. Would I be intrigued by him still? Would I want to speak to him? Or would I just ignore him and continue with my studies?

"Zexion, what's going on in that mind of yours?" I turn my head seeing a half awake Nine leaning against me.

"My antithesis, of course."

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**Fin**


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